Family Development Crises: Family Psychotherapy

In working with family crises, I rely on Transference-Focused Psychotherapy (TFP) and schema therapy. Often, during moments of intense stress, the psyche resorts to radical defense: we begin to perceive our partner in black-and-white, seeing only their flaws and completely devaluing all previous good experiences of living together (splitting mechanism). If an individual has a more vulnerable psychic structure (borderline personality organization, or BPO), such crises can trigger an intense, almost unbearable fear of being abandoned or, conversely, engulfed by the other. For individuals with a more stable psyche (neurotic personality structure), the crisis more often exposes internal conflicts between their own secret desires and a sense of family duty.

We will gradually explore which specific stable behavioral patterns and beliefs (maladaptive schemas) govern your reactions to the actions of loved ones. Analyzing what happens between us directly in the office (transference analysis), you will be able to see live exactly how you unconsciously construct relationships at home. Our main goal is to learn to tolerate complex, contradictory feelings toward the partner, to see them and yourself as integrated, with both strengths and weaknesses (tolerance of ambivalence). This leads to the construction of a mature, stable sense of one's "Self" (identity integration) and the capacity to navigate family storms without self-destructing from within.

When a family faces a normative crisis—such as the birth of a child, a teenage developmental transition, or "empty nest syndrome"—old modes of interaction collapse, and new ones have not yet formed. I view this process not simply as a series of domestic disputes, but as a painful collision of the partners' deep internal worlds. It is precisely during such transition moments that our earliest deficits and unmet needs are activated, which we unconsciously project onto our loved ones, forcing them to experience our own unbearable emotions (projective identification).

Partners may experience intense disappointment: it feels as though a completely stranger, cold, or hostile person has appeared beside you. This pain arises from the gap between the internal idealized image of the family and reality. My task is to help you see which specific hidden expectations and childhood wounds lie beneath your current arguments or silent alienation. I create a space where these vulnerable, frightened parts of your psyche can be explored without judgment or guilt.